ok think of it like jelly beans. if you can learn to like the licorice ones, youll always have lots of them because no one else wants them. its the same with fat chicks
It was like a spaceship landed and 1000s of hipsters filled up the park
Had a drunk dream about being in a six story taco bell. Oh my god the menu was incredibleeee
Its that time of week again, Bad life decision wednesday
I seriously might throw up right now. In class. Sunglasses on. I'm getting too old for this.
Well idk about you but my nose is all recovered for the weekend.
they wouldn't let me take the pitcher of beer on the ferris wheel
I don't remember anything past "we have 15 minutes to drink this keg."
I thought he was walking around the front. I just hit and run my booty call. I'm the worst non girlfriend ever
Any man who has a face like that and a bike, deserves a vagina like yours permanently.
I found all these half eaten mandarin orange on the ground and the bruises on my neck are definetely not hickies
I am making up for a 7 year dry spell so I get a pass and I don't always care if there is a second date. It is like college but with more money and condoms.
I am actually offended he hasn't asked me to sleep with him yet to get better grades...I wanted the whole college experience.
I couldn't break up with him while I was wearing a Hakuna Matata shirt.
What am I thankful for..I figured out I can drink on antibiotics without getting sick thanks to the power of pot gummies
Randomize
