the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
so i have my big date this weekend, and i was practicing giving head with a bottle in the shower. i stopped and looked at the botton of the bottle. it was PURE MOLD! if i die, dont tell the doctors how this happened....
i just went through and liked all 1,239 of her pictures instead of writing my english paper. don't tell her, i want her to be surprised
She was doing lines off of her friends boobs in the limo at 9 oclock on a thursday This has the potential to be the best weekend ever
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's the only person who can pull off turning an outdoor patio heater tower into a stripper pole.
IF CHARLIE SCHEEN CAN DO IT I CAN DO IT IM A PROFESSONAL
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
Don't remember shit. It was only until I saw the glaze on my forearm that I knew you drove to get donuts last night. I also spent 20$ there apparently
It's like god touched my soul and said 'you will be great in bed'
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he told me "apparently my gag reflex doesn't work so if you magically grew a penis I would deep throat you"
Fuck man, my Dad's been single so long I get him a year's sub to a porn site every year for for Father's Day
Is 1:30 too early for the bar?
Do you want my opinion or society's?
I want your company
Tell me why I woke up outside of our hotel room Wearing a cowboy hat and boots in Las Vegas.
The way I see it, there's 2 types of friends. Those you should do drugs with, and those you really,really shouldn't.
I doubt the gods of funday Sunday would exact such a high price... But it's good to know an afternoon with me is worth a left foot.
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