hey i know this is weird but does alcohol affect pregnancy tests?
He kept starring at my ass and repeating "Its Just a beautiful piece of artwork."
so he made me dinner last pm @whch point i askd if i could help out. he hands me his fucking laundry and asks me 2 do it
only you. it could only happen to you.
Just discovered Kim Possible porn. Life is now complete.
dont get me wrong, i like when a guy is into my boobs but when he started saying mama i want milk let me suck, i gathered my shit together and bounced.
beyond obliterated. i recall legitimately trying to use a ballpoint pen as eyeliner.
James and whatshisface bought me drunks. I am drinks.
He once got bit in the face by a dog and still got laid the same night. He owns Memorial Day Weekend
Come over. Drunk tacos.
That isn't even a sentence.
I kept the important parts.
I'm gonna fuck that sweet little pussy of yours into absolute submission
Wow. Sorry. As soon as I sent that I felt inappropriate. But yes. Bring a sandwich after. Lol
On second thought, is it weird that I scheduled a surgery that determines my fertility around lingerie football night? I might have fucked up priorities.
Absolutely not. I would have done the exact same thing.
She's started this new thing where whenever she drives by random couples talking alone outside she yells "break up! this is your sign!"
did i make more ranch sandwiches last night
you had 4
I shaved my asshole for you. You WILL fuck me tonight.
Back at condo with chick. What is the condom situation urgent response needed
Randomize
