i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
oh man you're gonna hate me when you log onto facebook. remember i love you
She has a concussion we think. Dancing to barbie girl.
woke up with withdrawal cold sweats this morning. spring break must really be over.
These 25 People Believed Fake Facts For Way Too Long
tolerance is too high. going on a liquor strike. ghandi style.
Kill yourself wednesday started off with a bang, and im pretty sure im still drunk from tequila tuesday.
That girl gave me her number because you were arrested. I am so proud of you dude.
I don't know if it was his cologne or his Jesus hair, but he was much more fuckable than last time I saw him.
Now that I think about it, it may have been the 6 pitchers of beer.
Just come get me. Somewhere there's hobo that's going to want his dumpster back, and I kinda want to be gone when he discovers the vomit.
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Just got hit on by a 50 year old Englishman who is now swapping drunken racing stories with my mom. Live Mariachi band in the background. How's that for a wake?
Oh yeah and one of the strippers brought you chips and water when you were passes out next to the toilet. So that was nice
THEY SELL PREFROZEN MARGARITAS AND THEY COME WTH A STRAW. MY PRIORITIES ARE IN ORDER
Her alarm in the morning was Best Day Ever from Spongebob. I'm have lots of conflicting feelings right now...
You can't give me tequila around boys who have girlfriends. That ain't new.
Definitely just poured my beer into a McDonald's cup so I could walk through Walmart without judgment. 'Murica.