I'm either going to be a Playboy Playmate or take over the world. Either way the world wins.
i dont know, i woke up and he was going down on me. i guess i can save his number
failed my one goal of the day: wake up before 2 pm.
He sent me a pic of his Junk. He said it was a Brett Farve valentine.
I always give him head in random places, it's a guessing game for his cock.
Tonight just feels like one of those I'm going to lose a shoe nights.
Dude, the chicks a procotolgy intern. Don't cheat on her. She knows where it hurts the most.
Yeah. Just jump him. Naked. Claim his dick for yourself.
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
A big toe in my vag is not foreplay.
WTF? Why is there a pic of my tits in ur dad's office?
You spent the entire night trying to get me to make out with you
yeah I remember. your boyfriend shouldnt have cheered me on though.
Buying a new bed right now. My options are limited because I need to be able to be tied to it.
We kept having to tell you that you couldn't just sit wherever you wanted at Walmart. Sitting in the middle of the raw meat section was unacceptable and children were staring at you.
You threw a beachball full of vodka at me and yelled I CHOOSE YOU then ran
Randomize
