I had just got her shirt off when I realized that I was about to fuck Chewbacca from Star Wars. The way she moaned confirmed that I was.
did you know delaware is a STATE? HOLY CRAP! i didn't till i was hitting on this chick and asked her when she said she was from delaware, which state that was in. crazyness
It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
he came so fast he could have be employed at jimmy johns
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
its not college until your roomate walks in on you having sex in his bed. twice
you goin out tonight?
who is this.
your orgasm for tonight
You made out with my dog and told me he tasted like a rainbow.
I'm two guys short from fucking the whole baseball team and one is gay. I will be successful by the end of this month.
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Pants off. Spirits lifted.
I'm high. Everything has a 45° angle. That is as far as my eyes open
There's some band that practices next door to my apartment. I'm thinking we may need to check that out. I could be like, "Hey boys, thought you might like some lemonade and vagina."
The only math I use in every day life is figuring out how much I can spend on alcohol and still have money to pay my bills. High school lied to us.
Add tweezing eyebrows to the list of things not to do while on adderol....
She’s a Vegas 8, which makes her an Oklahoma 27
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