I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
just threw up into the cup of Gatorade I was hoping would settle my stomach. thanks again, alcohol.
That reminds me...we need to get swords
I had to call maintenance to come unclog the toilet.
Something to remember me by.
I feel like I should lick our pitcher just so everyone knows its ours
This is your typical drubkba Amy test. Shout out to jisus for auto correct
Somehow ed fucked carrie while purposely not saying a single word to her all night. He just nodded and smiled.
Would it have been easier if he talked to her?
Yeah, but i bet him he couldn't do it. Now he gets a free taco bell combo of his choosing.
So the first 4 hours of my morning was equivalent to seeing under water. Things were starting to get better until I remember I drank mustard for free stuff and flossed my teeth with a strand of hair from a stranger in the bathroom.
Part of me really wants this picture, but the other part of me knows if he is really this drunk, he could be sodomizing a lamp and not know it
I made everything so magnificently awkward in under 15 seconds. I am magic.
i mean hes a break dancing puerto rican, how do you think the sex was?
Oh my god I'm in a public bathroom with a space heater. I never want to leave
Pants are for mortals
Accidentally made a straight guy question his sexuality again. I really gotta watch myself.
When a guy asks for your ig but you already know his blood type, social security number, & mother's maiden name.
Randomize
