they just came back. i guess "were gonna go get dinner" means "were gonna fuck for 5 minutes at the little league field"
He just asked me to come into his empty apartment after he called his parents to make sure they wouldn't come home while I was there. This is starting to look like a bad rape scene from one of those made-for-TV Lifetime movies.
Why would you say my penis is small in front of so many people?
fyi, if youre wondering if offering a female police officer sexual favors will get you out of a ticket, the answer is no.
His dick looked like E.T.'s finger. It scared me.
How do I tactfully ask if the neighbors downstairs can hear me beating it?
Fine. Just this once and because its veterans day will I send you a picture of my tits. You're lucky I love this country.
I need to find more Xanax, my Grandpa doesent leave for another week and he's made it a mission to get me to come out of the closet as a xmas gift to my parents.
I woke up in a sink... Not like curled up on top of it though. I was standing, bent over, face first. IN THE DAMN SINK.
Turn on the Discovery Channel
Lets fuck to motorcycle gang fighting
I think I just did my first walk of shame. He sent me home with a watermelon from his farm. Southern one night stands.
We were watching sports center while I blew him so we could see the football highlights. I missed fall
His dick is magical but I don't want to die in this blizzard do you see my dilemma
Sometimes a man just deserves to get woken up with a blowjob.
we were waffle house and a lady told me her imaginary friend was sitting in the chair next to her. i don't feel so trashy now.
Randomize
