Someone's got a whale tail
A thong is hangin out?
No, a fatty following them
Just ran into my ex in the WOMENS bathroom. He said I did this to him. Swore he never wore my clothes but said he liked my skirt. I need vodka.
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
I like how washing the beer bong is now a regular part of washing the dishes.
I'm the only adult here not drinking and their 2 year old daughter is trying to play dolls with me.. I've never been so demoralized in my life.
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
there was a kid getting taken out of the waterpark handcuffed to a wheelchair singing "tryna catch me ridin dirty"
My 16 year old coworker just told me I should take my job more seriously after she watched me puke in the backroom trash can. Fuck teenagers with morals.
I feel like I shouldn't have to explain to you why giving your cat weed was a bad idea.
the second she challenged me to mario kart drinking game i knew i was in love
I'm drinking coffee out of a pasta sauce jar and eating fruit soaked in Smirnoff. I think I've hit rock bottom.
Getting food poisoning after eating at work was the cherry on top of my "Welcome back to real life" sundae.
Dad smells like hangovers and 65 years of bitterness
The cat just brought me a bottle opener. I think she's my soulmate.
I'd ask how but then you'd tell me.
you know you're sexually deprived when you're holding a warm taquito in your hand and your vagina starts to tingle
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