3.50 mugs at the bar.
Nah man, im with an ugly chick. Im waiting til everyone's drunk enough tonight, they don't notice.
How ugly, and does she have friends?
i had a dream the other night i was titty fucking you while you were asleep, then you woke up and didn't care.
Well they kicked us out after we started heckling the acrobats
This is the 4th time we've hooked up, and this morning we woke up, he got out of bed and left. Left me alone in his apartment with 3 of his friends. Without even a word. Why do i like this guy?
Dad just showed up on someone else's golf cart, filled an ice chest with booze and left while yelling "SHINANIGANS!!!!" this is going no where fast.
We have started to decorate penises.
Oh fuck. There is like a human shit on the sidewalk. I hate this place.
We've only been here for 15 hours and our names are already on 2 separate police reports. We've also been given our "final warning" by the cops and hotel management.
Just stuck all that extra cocaine money we made in a savings account...like a responsible adult..
Um. Did you take a picture of me with a giant dildo after we went bowling?
I am never drinking with the goths again.
Ended up at the strip club, got told I should be a dancer 4 times, got free tacos and my hot TA slide in the dms. How was your night?
Still, being medically ordered to stuff things in your vagina is amazing.
I am at a cat party and I just witnessed people lapping vodka out of a bowl for a contest. Lol
dude I fucking saw you snort tequila
Randomize