i can't put facebook on my resume under hobbies.
Needless to say, wine tasting turned into wine chugging
I woke up 25 minutes ago and have been high for 20. Impressive?
how do i tell him I'm always in the mood without sounding like a slut?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just want a box on franzia all to myself. Just me, my wine, my tears, & my self loathing.
you have no idea how wierd it is to get nudes while talking to grandma
I have to fuck proof my bed. It was in the middle of the room this time.
Make sure you take the apple pie out of your pocket before you pass out.
Im eating a cannibus peanut butter and jelly sandwich, while snuggling a stuffed animal. Either this flu is really really harsh or I'm some kind of stoner toddler
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, the coffee is horrible this morning, Cass changed something about it
We ran out of Bailey's Irish cream...
This is what regular coffee tastes like?!?! Fuck the adult life.
I'd like to preapologize if you or your mom see me naked at some point this weekend.
In the words of my step grandma "whatever makes your pussy happy"
orgy was averted by karaoke, thank god
It's a sad day when you're not really phased by the McChicken video only because you've seen weirder porn.
you told me I was being patronizing because I didn't want you to run barefoot across a construction site
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