Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
thanks for not screaming that I'm pregnant when that guy was giving me his number.
i just ate two sandwiches and am debating booty calling my landlord
can't believe I ate straight coffee grounds to stay awake for that
Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
I'm sorry for what I said earlier...your vagina wouldn't look funny If you had a kid.
please dont let the old guy in the wheelchair see you when you wake up
You promised me a handle of vodka if I took home her ugly friend. Thanks to law class I took for the 2nd time I know that's a unilateral contract asshole
She is ok w me having sex for money. Just gotta find rich grandmas.
There was this blissful moment of peace and quiet... then you ran past our window with a lit firecracker in hand going, "SHIT. SHIT. SHIT!"
I told her to to let go of her rationtal thoughts and just enjoy the fact that i was going down on her till she passed out from sheer orgasmic pleasure.
I have shit my pants twice this week. #adulthood
idk i was trying to watch Fuller House and you got up out of a dead sleep, just in your boxers, said "no more Dave Coulier" and walked out to the living room and unplugged the router
Apparently his version of saying "I'm Sorry" is streaking around our apartment building then asking for a blow job.....
We made a blanket fort in my dorm room and fucked in it. Twice. I'm in love.
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