just walked out of chelsea's house and saw cameron slapping his dick against her car. cant even make this shit up if i tried.
Her vagina is like Vegas. high traffic and full of glitter.
I'm at a free clinic. Feel like I should cough or sneeze so it's not blatantly obvious I'm getting checked for STI's.
I actually want to hang out with her with our clothes on. That's a big step up for me.
We made out for three hours. Then she said she didn't sleep with redheads and left the party. So yes, I'm still drinking.
Why did you come into my room last night at 3am and pour monopoly money on me while you were crying?
Don't forget: you only show your tits for the good beads. Be judicious.
The only thing I remember is vomiting and then feeding my dog a Mcdonalds cheeseburger and telling him yolo
My boss just told me not to come back to work if I decide to drink. Challenge accepted.
Trying to convince myself that everyone keeps staring at me because I'm pretty and not because of my hickies.
So feel off my bed lastnight into the trashcan. On the plus side i thought under my bed was a cave and i went exsploring
WHEN THE HELL DOES ANYTHING IN OUR LIVES *EVER* GO AS PLANNED???
you were acting out moves from the wwe, in a dress. then you sceamed "you can't see me" and ran out of the apt.
I'm a mess. I mean I almost got off but I'm a fucking rubics cube down there so il givenhim the point
There's a lady rapping at me about making healthy food choices. She lives in a refrigerator. This is not okay with me
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