Have you not heard of Jennifer's supreme lust for William Shatner? She wants to eat Taco Bell off of his love handles
I cannot remember December 31 for the past 3 years. it might as well not even exist on my calendar anymore
you decided to have a spaghetti fight but then you got greedy and decided to eat it all.
I just smoked pot in front of my old Elementary School. It's like my Childhood and Adulthood are coming together in this awesome thing.
i remember too much of last night for it to have been successful
this kid woke up on our hotel floor and doesnt know how he got here
on my way back.. me and that kid will be great friends
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
Confirmed. Vegetarians give terrible head.
At some point tonight the bad ideas in my head became bad decisions that happened outside my head
Well THAT'S the last time I buy beer and baby wipes in the same Walmart run ... just wanted to shout I USE THEM TO REMOVE MY MAKEUP, YOU ASSHOLES
Nothing with ever convince me that she wasnt purposely left behind by our mother to ruin my life and fuck our family
Maybe is for pussies. We only say yes in this household
That's a gentle way of saying I passed out like an 18-year-old on his first trip to Tijuana
you put your keys in the fridge so you wouldn't forget your yoohoo
Saw throw up in the parking lot at work, glad I'm not the only one. But now the search begins.
Mary's wearing shades at her desk, brilliant!
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