I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
found scuba porn. totally not sexy. life continues to disappoint.
You poured your drink on yourself and then said "it's not a party until I'm wet"
Just grabbing my bra from a history teacher's desk in the Humanities building. Maybe I should stop drinking on weeknights
At what point in my life did a night that has strippers, belly dancers, tequila and a midget become "average"?
I am at Brians in a pirate costume, what the hell am I thinking
I think this bruise on my arm is actually an impression of your face
the good news is that even if it's Alex's, I can still say it's Colin's, because the kid will come out ginger anyway!
who knew there'd be a plus side to your ginger fetish one day?
I am actually offended he hasn't asked me to sleep with him yet to get better grades...I wanted the whole college experience.
I fell asleep giving a handjob, had a sex dream about giving a handjob, and woke up giving a handjob. Life.
Family trip though. I generally don't wheel too much ass with the fam in tow. Despite the fact my parents would be pleased if I did.
Dude is PACKING. And yes I am holding up a cross and holy water and hissing like a pissed off goose.
Did you pee in the oven last night??
You walked right into the door. Even the door guy and security guys were laughing.
Listen gotta draw the line somewhere. Apparently that line is at my nuts.
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