his fiance had made him a calendar of pictures of her. he asked if he should take it down and i said no. i wanted her to watch.
Dude i thought about you literally the second after I came. This friendship is starting to cross some serious boundaries
Exactly how does jacking off in my purse count as a 'early christmas present'?
If I die I have 2 requests one a viking funeral prye and 2 I want you to take over my facebook and haunt the fuck out of everyone
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I mean I drunk but not enough to handle a Scientology convention
Best part: she drunkenly told me I'm dangerous then slurred to my parents that I should watch out in case I fall in love with her. Then she mounted a pinata
Just witnessed my roommate pick her nose and eat it in her sleep. Remember, you made out with that.
FUCK BUDDYS DON'T HOLD HANDS. NO EXCEPTIONS.
Hahahaaa There's this one girl crying hysterically and wrapped around (i believe) her ex's leg. He's trying to shake her off without spilling his beer. This is fucking priceless.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
it's all fun and games til I text you in last nights clothes with a head bleed
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
I'm sorry I pissed in your bedroom and then woke you up when I tried to jump off the balcony
the hot lifeguard just pulled a McDonald's cheeseburger out of her fanny pack.
I wiped my ass with a McDonalds wrapper. I've hit an all time low. Sorry for my impatience
I was so high last night that at one point I kept licking his neck saying he tasted like soap and truffles.
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