i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
i mean you're really good at taking the morning after pill...so you could put that on your resume..
yeah, i think fast in a bad sitatuion and am able to react with appropriate measures
you don't know how close you are to someone till they ask you to shave their ass.
Michael Bay is the white Tyler Perry.
why does the wii remote smell like your vag?
Remember me drinking the vodka from in between your legs?
Do you know what the cost code is for strip clubs? I'm filling out my company expense report right now
There aren't enough words in the English language to fully describe how worried I am for your dick. And the rest of you, I suppose.
They pay me enough to pretend to be either helpful, or heterosexual. If they want both I need one hell of a raise.
Whats a little naked between friends. Just don't laugh or I'll be scared for life.
Hey, it's Valentine's Day weekend and were single and off our periods. Let's live like queens.
RICK BROUGHT THE HOT BARTENDER HOME. SOMEONE CALL THE FIRE DEPARTMENT, CUZ RICKYS ON FIIIIIIIRE.
lmao nvm she punched him in the face and left
By the time I realized I was watching a Danish porno with muppets it was already too late
I’ve gone two rounds already this morning and I’m ready for a third. The moon is in the house of sluticus hornius.
Pretty sure he was in my class in like 2nd grade
I like how you know everyone I've ever fellated.
Randomize
