Do you have a shampoo for semen
Or a time machine
really keith? you showed me your dick and your not gonna text me back
Dude I just masturbated laying underneath my Christmas tree. Apparently all I want for Christmas is to get laid.
I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
i dont understand why you dont get why i love him. i opened the bathroom door and he had his penis in his right hand and a mcdouble in his left.
You can't have your penis and eat it, too.
I wish I could sell my textbooks directly to my drug dealer and cut out the middle man
...and the foreplay consisted of me threatening to cut off his hand if he didn't remove it from my back.
There was a guy on the elevator dressed as santa in flip-flops giving away beer.
I'm sorry I murdered your sperm with my alcohol saturated Olympic uterus.
let's just say if he has a penis and he hypothetically needs to put it somewhere... i would take care of that for him.
You shouldn't do laundry high cus pink.
The three yr old girl I nanny grabbed a pole just now and is chanting "this is my house"
Sounds like you at that dive bar last weekend
Went out with the family last night and some 40 yr old lady wanted to take me home. My mom was not happy with me
Just took an Adderall with Pedialyte so I think that's a valid answer to "how are you doing"
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