It's just you. You wear the fuck me fedora and wear baller shorts, hollywood hippie who thinks she is shakira when she's drunk.
Was going to watch Bolt. Fucked a stranger instead. Details later.
So you didn't like Bolt?
Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
Please tell me that text was part of your elaborate Brett Favre costume; otherwise, dude, wtf?
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
are you still mad that doritos made their way into my sex life
.....a litte
Well his dad was his wingman, so I had to fuck him. I didnt want his dad to think that he was doing a bad job and I was drunk enough to think he was doing a good job.
Score one for dad.
Honestly I'm so excited to go to bed I feel as if I don't deserve to be in my early twenties.
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
After you passed out we took your car to the campus and stole a 150lb plaque that's now in your trunk. Happy birthday!
She just sent me a message. It's a poem, about eternal love, that she wrote, about us. Just because I took her home two nights - doesn't mean it's eternal love.
Oh boy I hope we come out of this alive. And with clean prison records
Morning! Im using your rent money to snort percocet.
I have an interview tomorrow! The couple we regularly swing with said I could use them as references. Winning
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
Randomize
