dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
she asked if i had a condom...i said yes...when we finished it wasnt on...told her it was at home on my dresser.
my step dad just called me a drunken slut..someone in my family finally understands me
Found a pint glass in my snow pants.
Then he wanted a handjob in the car. While my cousin was driving. To krispy kreme. And there was someone else in the backseat.
Jesus...So southern.
A kind stripper put a blanket over me last night
Two words. Shotgunning Cognac.
This has already gotten way out of hand
You can't possibly imagine how much I miss you. At least I'll always have that hidden folder in my computer.
I just pulled a piece of cookie out of my bra in the middle of class. I'm forever alone.
Apparently all year they've been using me as a standard of drunkenness
I just literally had a dance party in my closet. I've never been this blazed.
I've been to his house multiple times since that night and I STILL can't find my bra. And he says the hot tub ate my thong.
I'm too drunk to explain this to you. It's too hard.
Blacked out and Irish exited last night. At dinner. On a Sunday.
Okay, since we're going to be living together and I'm obviously better than you at everything, I have one single simple rule that I want you to follow: DO. NOT. FUCK WITH ME.
Randomize
