she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
FYI-Owning a kitty significantly lowers your chances of ever seeing mine...
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
just had amazing sex with a girl I got caught with in second grade playing doctor. her examination is finallllly over
I have a beer in one hand and a slim fast in another. It's another one of those wednesday nights.
I'm by the dj to the left. Come get me now this girl is talking about baby names and I dnt even no hers
I can't see you
I'm the only one that's wearing a tarzan outfit get your ass over here you douche
how exactly do you say, "i only agreed to meet you for breakfast because i thought we could go to your place and fuck afterwards."
seeing two freshman taking a cab home at noon on a Monday makes me realize how much worse my life choices could have been
You're just gonna have to make the sacrifice man.
I'm trying to hide in the table.
I just want to have sex and eat dumplings. Is that so much to ask?
YOURE ABOUT TO SEE SO MUCH UNCIRCUMCISED DICK
Did you leave it the depths of Magic Mike's favorite banana hammock?
How did you tell her we met?
I told her that we met at the sex shop down the street, I thought it would be the most reasonable explanation.
yes, i'm a douce. but i'm a high quality douche.
Yeah, but i got vodka and bacon out of it, so it's fine.
Randomize
