Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
this bucketlist has just become an excuse for me to be slutty, and i'm not even ashamed
Two questions. One. Where are you watching election results tomorrow? Two. Can we have Obama victory sex?
YOU ARE THE WORST TRAVEL AGENT! THIS IS A SINGLES CRUSE FOR SENIORS. THEY ALL THINK IM THE FUCKING WAITRESS JUST CAUSE IM BLACK!!!
This is the second girl that said she wanted to fuck me while wearing a clown nose. Fuck online dating
He ended up buying the equivalent of dinner at a Mexican place, in weed
I woke up at 5am to tell him I wanted to take his dick on la Tour de France, I might need a nap later
My grandpa is driving me to get condoms and wine. This is adulthood.
There is a dude riding on one of those standing wheel things inside forever 21. Calm down.
She fucked the dishwasher AND the manager.
Well, she isn't a classist. You've got to give her that.
No joke. There's a picture of the priest I made out with on my parents' refrigerator.
If you sleep with him I will stab you int the uterus with a pitchfork.
Prepare the pitchfork.
I would accept a super bowl ring as an engagement ring
holy shit! you were walking down a hill and just happened to be passing a trash can like 4 ft away and projectile vomited over a fence into the trash can. kept walking and drank a beer.
I need to bang the neighbor boy. He’s given three women screaming orgasms this week alone.
Also, my apartment walls are too thin
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