I keep trying to sit and the chair keeps running away from me
Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
you used progresso chicken soup as a mixer last night
they found her hiding behind the couch trying to feed a cabbage patch doll a bottle of tequila. please tell me she's on birth control.
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Somehow she slept thru the vacuuming, people walking in and out, and the sound of constant beer bottles hitting the trash, but when someone said weed in a regular volume of voice she startled awake.
Just found my shirt from Saturday, got an automatic contact buzz.
Yeah, he said he was getting "welcome back Winnipeg Jets drunk" then puked on his jersey.
That is correct. I did in fact somehow pass out in the tanning booth for over an hour. And yes the attendant did have to open it up and shake me awake.
That's unfortunate. Distance can be a stoner's greatest enemy.
You make it sound like a battle for Middle Earth.
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Someone spilled vodka all over the elevator floor. Bring straws.
dont iron anything. we fucked on the ironing board. details to follow.
Will it make you feel better if we wear the title of dysfunctional fucking roommates? It requires monogamy unless we want to bang someone together.
I'm going to miss hockey season. It was the best excuse to get drunk on a Tuesday night.
Just had a flashback of scottish man yellin' at my face. What the fuck I did?
I went to my AA meeting last night. My drug dealer is now my counselor.
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