we both passed out while playing beer pong, woke up in the morning and continued to play coffee pong to cure our hangovers
just saw a guy try to order booze in his coffee at 8 am.
I just realized I had sex more when i looked like a fat elton john. Fuck my life.
Just stole a pregnancy test from Wegmans because I didn't want to pay 13 dollars to find out my life is over.
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
I was really sad when you left and cried. And i don't know what a face promise is, but apparently i made you make one.
Found a 10-can wizard staff hidden in our closet. Did we cut someone off?
That's yours. We cut you off.
i dont care. it has been a 14 hour day, and we are all celebrating by alternating shots and grilled cheese.
I go to a class slightly intoxicated and they bring in a baby. What a life.
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
.It's like gods test of willpower against vaginal comfort
I don't know how to say "Sorry I was banging your boyfriend before I knew about you but you're awesome and we should hang out." without just saying it.
its 11:20. i'm drunk in class flying paper airplanes for my final. what the fuck is my college experience right now?
I think we have some hyper-understanding of each other when drunk, because looking back at our text convo from last night, they were literally just jumbled letters.
Randomize
