he is not the type of person you only have sex with once. god adds years to your life every time you sleep with him.
This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
Nothing says "You're all grown up now" like setting up your 401k with shitty underwear.
Also I got A jello shot for $2!!! It's like the forever 21 of bars
You know there's only so much I can do with a great personality.
Come over we're drinking with orange soda as a chaser to honor 90s nick kenan and kel.
We haven't even scratched the surface on the damage we could do. Just saying
Well my friend Jon slept on the couch and I slept next to my cooked lean pocket on the carpet
I should never be allowed to dance around children at weddings. I think I just insured that a 4 year old will be a future teen mom.
i don't know if this is a cannibal joke or a sexual innuendo, and i think that's a beautiful description of our relationship.
There is a midget in cheetah face paint on a leash here
Does being an adult mean drunkenly signing for your tax return from a foreign country? If so, I've reached adulthood.
Dude, I'm not going to use a butt plug.
Remember when we got high off our ass and you talked me into running in place then punched me in the face and said it was a wall?
Ya, you were bleeding for an hour and a half
Randomize
