i must have dtf stamped on my forehead
You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
Ran into that hot funeral director in the bar two days after the wake. pretty sure we drunk made out.
Grandpa would have been proud
Mom just apologized for her lack of a gag reflex not being genetic.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
oh my god its dad's weekend for the sororities i can't wait to throw up in front of all these parents
I'm thankful she wil die Alone. And I'm thankful I slept wiht her cousin. And brother.
What can i say, i'm an artist. I think deep thoughts. In between the homoerotica and pterodactyl noises
I want you to know that the guy who peed in your bed got fat.
"I'm pretty sure all our toasts were to Ben Afflecks penis last night."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
But seriously, I love you and you are a good person and I'll get you some ecstasy
My phone has started autocorrecting "monogamy" to "monogamish"
I just got offered free tattoos if I smuggle some guns from OKC to Dallas for a guy in the hells angels
What color nail polish screams, "Either fuck me or get the hell out of my way"?
First dip in a brand new jar of Nutella, and my man’s dick are two things I will not fucking share.
You tried to eat your way through the wall. Like you literally tried to eat drywall and insulation.
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