They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.
One girl peed the bed, one lost her panties, another woke up on the piano, I have pink eye and door knobs are missing. This is why I stay in Nebraska
I cleared a drunken path to my bed for you. If you hit clothes you've gone too far.
He grabbed onto my boobs while slipping on ice then proceeded to drag me down with him I'm not predicting head in his future
Have I told you recently that I love you, if for no other reason than you make my irresponsible substance abuse look tame by comparison?
He calls it "his noble steed" and i plan to ride it.
That's cool. At least the punch line of my story isn't I shit in a booth at Denny's.
Is this the girl that wrote "Poon Slayer" across my chest?!
I'm using the bullet from my cock ring to massage out my tmj lock jaw from giving too much head.
It's midsummers eve. A.k.a. come over so we can get drunk and wear leaf crowns
what better to celebrate not being pregnant than to eat a bowl full of rum soaked pineapples?
Honestly I really just want to do you in the mail truck. Thought about it a lot today
Also what’s the official rule on washing one guy’s jizz off my back before I go out with another guy? That I should?
Did you happen to find the other half of my bra last night?
Quick question: now that you've broken up, should I also delete the nudes your boyfriend sent me while you were together??
Randomize
