Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
I am stoned and watching Pocahontas. I am letting the kids eat whatever they want. I am the best babysitter in the whole wide world
you'd be confused too if you woke up to pictures of a ghostbuster doing body shots off you.
It's 10am. I'm hungover wearing a flyers jersey and a phillies hat and eating a cheesesteak. I'm not the only one. Best city ever.
I had to call maintenance to come unclog the toilet.
Something to remember me by.
You were yelling at the bowl of salad and telling it to quit taunting you and telling you to go to tacobell
definitely fulfilled the lesbian status quo and fucked her in the back seat of my prius
she's sitting in the bathroom of SA telling people to come in for a toilet ride
Dude this deaf chick is totally hot, I just bought an apartment on boner ave
Either way, we will celebrate half Christmas the only way we can. Completely and irresponsibly wasted.
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
Got head last night. Had the 3D glasses on the whole time.
I was going through my settings and the phone randomly started playing "Crazy Little Thing Called Love" by Dwight Yoakum. Out loud. At full volume. I was shitting. There were 3 other people in the bathroom. I love iOS 7.
I put in a tampon while driving a moving vehicle. I feel like this is simultaneously a new low and the sort of feat that deserves a merit badge.
I HAVE TOO MICH DICK TALKING TO ME IDK WHAT TO DO.
Randomize
