I fink we're distracting them from bumping the proverbial uglies
I decided to name my penis gatorade...is it in you?
apparently red wine has the total opposite effect that whiskey does on his dick
i walked into the party and i guess everyone knew because they began to chant "ass to mouth"
he likes to slap my ass alot untill he missed and hit his own balls poor bastard kept on going.
She is singing the swedish chef song and throwing utensils. I love this place
I saw a kid peeing outback so I yelled "you have a small pecker, but its ok cuz when life gives you lemons..." and proceeded to throw lemons at him
Idk who invented dominoes cheese steak pizza but I wanna lick their balls
I feel like if he almost got me pregnant once, i can at least say hi in a bar
I got with him in my watermelon costume so ya you owe me $1
The ecstacy made me so dehydrated I started licking condensation off car windows
Can I fire a pigeon out of a t shirt gun?
Also he said my vagina was sculpted by gods so there must be some feelings here.
Mike Pence got the fuck boy eyes though
Do you ever go take a shit and end up sitting on the toilet for like 45 minutes wondering what the fuck you're doing with your life?
Everyday my friend, everyday.
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