Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
I would have been "that girl" at the party last night if it wasn't for that girl who puked in the potted plant...
i can tell by the sound of your bed that he isnt that good at sex.
just skyped with my friend to listen in on the people talking shit about me in the library. creepy or strategic?
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
im pretty sure this vending machine only exists when im drunk
I'm sorry I didn't respond. I had a shit day. However, I just masturbated to Adele's Rolling In the Deep while crying. It was oddly therapeutic.
I just made a drug deal 100% through snap chat
I knew things were bad when my gyno recommended meditation.
What eyeshadow color says "yes I am at the dentist, and yes I am hungover please don't judge my life choices"
So I'm pretty sure I told every one at the party that "I'm going to fuck my pillow pets tonight?"
The problem I'm having with looking for jobs while drunk is reading is really hard
You're either getting fucked or a coupon to Friendly's. I haven't decided yet.
What's the blow job-backrub exchange rate these days? I've got some killer stress knots
drunk boyfriend and drunk me are NOT meant for each other
Randomize
