It feels like he gave my taint an indian burn.
Well now I have my semen on her headphones
When I try to close my eyes ibwant to puke. Going to the basement to watch pocohantas. That'll keep myeyes open. And puke free.
In case you were unaware playing with rabbits on ecstasy is the greatest thing ever. I feel like I'm ODing on adorable right now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No more scars from drunken holidays, people are starting to notice.
It's his sex noise. "I'm gonna cu-THE LORD IS MY SHEPARD AND I SHALL NOT WANT"
Operation: pick up a lawyer was a resounding success. Commence operation: football mugshot weekend
I think having a vagina should be considered a skill, give me a break.
This is my life. Enjoy the view
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Im going to hell I gave him a handjob on the plane next, to an old guy playing video games on his iPad, on good friday.
And you are going to be so turned on by my batman skills later
Just took acid. Wish me luck.
I worked out twice today and you're dropping acid. My life sucks.
what is considered shitting yourself?
Like my underwear wasn't soiled, but there was definitely a departure from my asshole.
I wasn't going to drink. Then there was alcohol so I gave that up.
Omg, new summer goal: sex in a bouncy castle.
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