so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
We had sex on the first date...do you think he thinks I'm a whore?
Yes and so do I
The Mets? Come back? That'd be like Nickelback writing a good song.
Considering last night's endeavors, I am going to hell 5 times over. 1 for puking on a hobo, 1 for laughing about it, and 3 for remembering it today and laughing about it sober
I Apparently saved a picture of the Eiffel tower in between 2 pics of his dick. It appears to be the same size. I fucking love Paris.
They called me at 5 AM saying they had a present for me
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
I send him pictures of my tits whenever I feel like he's paying too much attention to his girlfriend.
Nothing bad can happen when you have a kiwi flavored condom. Absolutely nothing.
cool, get new shit, I dnt want the same old if it's my last drink ever
The world isn't ending you idiot. I'll grab beer
I've never heard "I will drown your mother in vanilla pudding" as an insult before, and then last night happened.
I like that you use a Disney movie to describe the starting of our BDSM relationship, lmao
He radiates elegant sexual dominance. I bet even his balls have pinstripes.
We fucked on the roof... like that has to mean something
I'm doing my drinking workout. 20 pushups for each beer I finish. I should write a fucking book
Randomize
