good call on bringing her. it's always good to invite chicks who mix booze and prescription drugs.
I drunk wandered into my parents bed and slept between them
What's the rule on cocaine before dinner?
Its 11 o'clock somewhere
I know this is really fun but I don't wanna glow anymore
In his defense he just bought a bong like a week ago so he's still in that honeymoon phase.
she keeps dunkaroos and gatorade in her bed. yep pretty sure im in love.
After a while I was so wet that I started crying. HE MADE ME SO HORNY I WEPT.
New fact of life: getting Becca high never helps any situation at all ever.
Do you feel better now that you've sent me a picture of your dick?
Yep.
Anyone who does not consider cereal and wine as a balanced breakfast needs to leave immediately.
If you don't respond in the next 30min, I'm going to assume your in a sex coma, in jail, or dead... All of which I've become accustomed to, and will follow the appropriate channels of notification once you notify me.
He ran out to tell us that somebody flooded the bathroom, then went back in there fell on his ass and asked why the floor was wet
I remember that. We went to taco bell looking for pizza.
Listen all I know is that mistakes were made and she stole the car and drove half an hour for food at 4 am
I snuck a teenager into a club last nite, I felt like such a criminal. It was Awsome
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