By the way, shout wipes are a gift from god for people that throw up on themselves.
So I was watching the View and they were saying oral sex is the new goodnight kiss
So when are we having a sleepover?
there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
Bad idea pregaming graduation.... she just threw up before walking across the stage... i'm gonna miss this
The only thing worse than listening to you two fuck all night was waking up and smelling bacon and there not being any left.
she spent the whole night flailing her arms because "primates are the only species who can move their arms like that and we shouldn't waste it"
i've never smoked before...when you said wake and bake i thought you meant like a funeral bbq or something
No one will ever love me with the amount of puke on my hand
I think I collapsed a disk in my spine when I drunkenly lifted that fat girl on my shoulders to chicken fight at the pool.
I don't think he cares about your inhospitable uterus.
Just because the energy drink is shaped like a grenade doesnt make it cool to throw it and yell "BOOM" and break my flatscreen, asshole
The chances of me making out with someone next weekend are about the same as me not remembering it.
Oh my fucking god, I was conceived on the first date.
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
we are not getting arrested this weekend. I don't care who I have to blow its just not happening.
Randomize
