i just got a UPS package from a name and address i dont know, with one of my thongs in it. no recollection.
if I was a wizard from waverly place we wouldn't b having these problems
Its that time of week again, Bad life decision wednesday
let's get a trip to cabo together for next spring... they have to have forgotten about me by now
We are cuddling. She is so cute when she is too high to be a loud bitch.
It's okay though. My mom didn't believe that they were mine cuz they were magnums. Having a surprisingly large penis ftw
I'm doing the Macarena naked in my living room right now
I see you're taking unemployment seriously.
For the record we tried to find 4th of july porn. Did not turn out well.
my human sexuality class is the only class where the porn i watch the night before is relevant to the discussion the next day
If there's one thing i learned from edward 40hands is that i couldnt handle life with bottles for hands
We woke up on vday and got high and played frisbee in our living room for a couple hours and then had sex. It was probably the most romantic valentine's day i've ever had
I took a dab in Denver and was I. Rocky Mountain national park almost to Wyoming before I realized I missed my turn.
We go out and drink, fuck, and I stay the night. He agrees to it because he knows I'll hook him up to IV fluids in the morning. Everyone wins
I've never sung with balls in my mouth
They say you need two forms of ID, but in reality 1 nice set of tits works every time
Randomize
