This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
Let's just have a brief moment of silence for my dignity before we start tonight
If a man's penis is referred to as "the family jewels" does that make a woman's vagina a jewelry box?
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
On a lighter note, the guy I gave a lap dance to then fell asleep on his crotch just facebook friend requested me..
Putting all my energy Into finding a polite way to ask my mailman to fuck me in his car.
We need large glitter to throw at people to signify our mystic nature
Fuck their feelings and their drinks they will get hit with sparkly confetti
Maybe is for pussies. We only say yes in this household
I'm gonna face reality, tomorrow morning is not on my hungover agenda.
I found a blow up pig at an adult store. He will have to fuck that on video if he wants anal. Also, I bought a pair of clear high heels. Tell your brother I love him.
Bring me that man meat
I think we ended 5-7 relationships as well this weekend...so another good stat
apparently i ended up downloading "thats amore", giving him head, and singing it... all at the same time
Remember the Giant sandworm from the movie Dune? Well that's about how big his dick is. No bulshit.
Randomize
