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ok, stay where you are, be there soon
I really like him. That's why I'm having sex with someone else, so he doesnt think i'm a slut.
I just had the ultimate walk of shame. I'm barefoot, in his gym short with vomit in my hair and I walked half a mile through campus. At noon. Thanks for picking up ur phone
What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
If you try to operate on me with a Bic pen and vodka, I'm never talking to you again
For the record, saying you're friends with the owner doesn't work when the owner is the one throwing you out.
she asked to have her picture taken with every guy we walked by.
oh, i've got big weekend plans. on an unrelated note, do you think viagra will work if the guy is roofied?
Just because you can put your penis in it does not make it "good stuff".
How do I go about messaging a girl on a dating site whose little sister I've had a three some with...?
And we had three hours of crazy sex then his roommate ate pizza off me while I was sleeping.
Well if YOU HAVE TO KNOW, we're laying across the street from the bar on that grassy hill trying to see who's she's with at the bar.
IT'S PERFEFT
... what?
HIS DICK. IT'S PERFECT. BYE.
not even sure this counts as hungover but like my body can't exist in reality today
I knew she was the one when we had sex to the halo soundtrack.
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