I was so drunk last night, I had to Wikipedia what i did.
Dude. Fucked her last night. Fucked her this morning. went downstairs for water. took 18 pack of Coors Light instead and took it back to my gf's. Got a blow job from her. Drinking the beer on my deck now. Best Day ever.
How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
I just figured I'd let u know that you bought a yacht on ebay last night
Being a responsible DD does not include attempting to coordinate a 4 taxi caravan to bar #3
This is the time you want your cat to have telepathy with you. To know if the guy downstairs left.
Is this girl REALLY making a smoothie in the bathroom right now?
Sitting in back of morning lecture drinking a daqueri from my pink unicorn cup. Pretty sure the girl next to me smells it.
We are stranded. Come find us. Bring an egg
The band last night was really good
That was definitely karaoke. Guess that answers my follow up question on how drunk you were.
He was wearing a diaper to the party. I've never felt like such a creep in my life.
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
I just put my eye make up on in the bathroom of the bar.... I may be too comfortable here....
Saw a sign that said the chorus of never gonna give you up was enough time to wash your hands. Coronavirus has Rick rolled me.
Randomize
