Also, I'm sitting at a crosswalk watching two Mexican gangs fight each other. I miss you too. A lot.
you know whats awesome about this morning. A suprise visit from my dad at 7:30 am. There was a pair of heels on the lawn and a girl sleeping in just her underwear on the floor of my living room. He either thinks im a champion or a total fuck up. I'm thinking fuck up but im hoping champion.
eating toast while peeing. You think this what kanye meant by the good life?
i just used a pokemon card to do blow. i need an adult. now.
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
stripped for him at 3am on my childhood playground and used the swing set as a pole.
In chronological order you drank, sang, smoked, napped, threw up, cried, laughed, described your pubic area, passed out. You have abused the privilege to use me as your D.D.
I want to be ashamed of the things we do this weekend
I can't let him end my perfect streak. HE USED TO BE FAT
Oh FYI, people asked how/why I met you and I didn't want to say "drunk at a party on an air mattress" so I made a story up. It was a very cute and charming story with no alcohol.
I may, or may not have licked his face in an Applebee's.
I mean he gave me an 'I owe you an orgasm' fist bump
Ordained minister or not I hereby renounce all moral responsibility for any and all related occurrences
EVERYTHING IS DISNEY. Even my sexting can lead to Disney.
OMG. When you threw the used condom on your floor you threw it in my purse!!! I just went to grab my headphones and it was stuck to them!
Randomize
