so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
He is currently pregaming mini golf. MINI GOLF.
I feel like I have heartburn in my nipples.
Serious question: Should I volunteer to get tazered? My instincts say no but my wild side says yes.
You know what would make this walk of shame even better? Picking up my cap n gown on the way to my car
I threw up in the darkest corner of the bar last night, then watched 2 girls freak out in disgust after walking through it. I then realised I puked on the dancefloor, took a picture and proceeded to send it to my mom.
There's "red head", "preppy white girl" and "the two Asians I dated and now everyone thinks I like Asians"
Your dating history is like the united colors of Benetton
Who doesnt want to be Yoda? I mean seriously, how sweet would that be? Live to 400, not give a shit about love and all that, know fucking mind tricks and smoke awesome swamp weed. I'm down.
First day back to class and I have already pulled out the hard liquor
I have never encountered a chode in the wild
If you hear death cries, thats me singing. Just let me be.
You're lucky I'm holding your vagina in my best interests
The bouncer said the club was at capacity we couldnt get in till ppl left all three of them pulled their tits out we got complimentary bottle service never under estimate women
I just walked in on Joel doing a buck naked tripod headstand in front of the mirror so he could see the bug bite on his balls
Randomize
