I wish scraping a resin bowl could be considered cleaning.
Yep just saw a license plate that read "taint 2" which implies there is a "taint 1". Only in Florida
it was like having sex with a tree stump
His mom walked into the kitchen smiling, made a scotch on the rocks, hit my bong, and told us goodnight enthusiastically. He's suddenly more appealing to me.
The last thing I remember is funneling tequila out of a pink noodle.
was it good sex?
i mean it was good for how drunk we were. and for how big the closet was
Gosh I haven't been pantsless in front of anyone for a while. It's time for me to pick up my game. We need a party. I need some rum.
If you have a glass table... Put it up. I don't wanna hurt myself again, I just got my stitches out...
I thought I was smashed last night but the girl trying to pee in the fridge had me beat. True story.
I thought I was heading girls talk. It was the toilet. Like put my ear to it
Next time a random bus filled with santas pulls up to the bar, I'm not getting on it.
I had to rename my dildo. I met a little kid who named his teddy bear the same name. It just felt wrong.
So I just saw someone get shoved into a car trunk by your car.
Oral sex and brunch. The perfect sunday morning.
FYI - Don’t go in the downstairs bathroom. Ryan is passed out naked on the floor with a raging hard on.
Randomize
