You can tell alot about a person by their poo.. For example, he was a smoker.
I just walked in on my dad looking at porn. is there protocol for this?
his pokemon pajamas? the fact that he was proud of the stretchmarks on his arms? or finding out he has a daughter that went to high school with us? ...you tell me what was the dealbreaker
Changed it back. Somehow I didn't think my profile pic should be me shirtless on ecstasy, ya know?
You graduated two years ago... You can't keep using spring break as an excuse.
I found her in the bathroom licking her screwdriver off the floor. she said there was no way she was wasting a $6 drink.
I have a plus one for the Blackout Express, should I pen in your name?
Sorry I sent so many blank messages. My hands are slippery. Don't ask why.
Made out with a girl in a wheelchair and rode her around while I was blackout. On a new level.
I was dressed as bob Ross as this occurred
Definitely worth waiting her kid to got to sleep when the first thing you hear once she's back is "I want you in my ass right now"
Uhh... I think I meant "Be proud, I'm taking shots before my public speaking test." "Coffee and vodka is not good" and "Also, I'm giving blood drunk."
He sent me a picture of his dick saying "your throne my lady" for my birthday. He knows the way to my heart.
I'm going to draw something on my chest and I need to incorporate my nipples. Any ideas?
Just a typical Friday. Dinner, drinks, doing lines with a member of Congress
Ahhh, beer. My second favorite breakfast drink.
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