Dear __, it'd be a lot easier to fuck if you ever responded. So I'm throwing in the white towel, since I no longer know what you want. Sincerely, ___
This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
just saw a guy try to order booze in his coffee at 8 am.
I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
He was sweet. He even warned me that his dick curved, and I quote, "more than a banana."
He also informed us that it's rude to shove your tit in someone's mouth. Happy Monday.
she brought my homemade cookies with condoms taped to the box... im in love
So I found the perfect "Yeah I gained weight since high school but it went to all the right places" outfit for the reunion this weekend.
I chugged a beer while I was riding him and he told me it was the sexiest thing he has ever seen. this guy knows class when he sees it.
You know you can't live off of vodka and pizza rolls forever
I'VE ALREADY MADE MY CHOICE
Idk what the interview would be like but I imagine you in a suit and tie surveying a nervous freshman and eventually leading him into a labyrinth of debauchery and clapping him on the back, saying "welcome to the fraternity, son"
He told me he needed "space" but then goes and likes my insta of panacakes.. Done.
You put a bag of sliced onions in the microwave then screamed, "voila, onion rings!"
So. Um. Hypothetically speaking...how would one get a squirrel out of the house?
Was cussing out our DD when one of the strippers takes him backstage. WTF
They call him magic hands is all I know.
Somethings are best left a mystery
Randomize
