we are learning about oedipus in english. fuck you for making this awkward for me
I'm so hungover i just sang the alphabet to see if "Z" comes after "W"
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
He just kept yelling woof and then threw money all over me...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i think i left a case of beer in your dryer
I feel awful
Physically or morally
Physically. The only immoral thing I did was steal money from strippers while they gave me lapdances.
What's the sex policy on a school bus? Because I dibs back seat.
Sex allowed. Dress code is neon and obnoxious.
We are gonna die. I wanna enforce the "no jumping out of moving vehicles" policy. And how are we gonna get a school bus through mcdonalds drive thru?
And have you ever tried to explain a hickey to your own grandmother?
Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
People were staring and acting all judgmental and offended... Like they've never seen anyone breastfeed in a liquor store.
Less than a month to go... I do not understand how I was able to put up with a roommate who wears bright green Crocs for a year.
How much money would it take for the bouncer to get us beers while we wait in line to get in?
$450 apparently whoopwhoop
You think he will forgive me for the paper being a week late if I bring him a beer?
...it's a 9am class...
My date bailed but I got to take a nap so I'm cool with it.
On a side note. I slept with a stuffed giraffe last night. Found it in my bed when I came home and snuggled with it. Drunk me reverted to being 2
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