My vagina just recognized that song.
They're watching TV in bed. The Golden Girls to be exact. Aaaand I just heard them singing along with the theme song. I love living with gays.
I like that we make it a requirement to howl at the moon every time we get drunk together.
I stopped in the middle of puking to wish you a happy birthday, so by default it means a lot.
So apparently we dropped beers outside the apartment last night, and someone RETURNED them! Ha like what? I just walked out the front door to Christmas in a box on my doorstep.
Chick last night said she only gets off if she rubs her childhood blanket her parents gave her during sex
Did the vodka turn my hair yellow or did something else happen last night?
There is a glee sing along. It's on random and they know them all. Like, the specific glee timings and pauses. I need to leave. I need to escape
"The cab driver felt bad for us so he stopped to buy us chocolates. That counts as a valentine!"
We cuddled after till the morning. Then he woke up sober... and straight.
I need to see you idiots before I go back to school. But we shouldn't snort Crown Royal this time.
Are you vicariously golddigging through me?!
Do you ever have one of those days when your breasts are just fucking awesome?
I'm eating Arby's in the bathtub because I'm an adult and I do what I want
Was cussing out our DD when one of the strippers takes him backstage. WTF
They call him magic hands is all I know.
Somethings are best left a mystery
Randomize
