i thought he was 22...he said he was 25..he was 19...im 26..it doesnt count if you dont know right?
how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
Shark Week may as well be Shark Weed.
I made myself breakfast and everything and then whoever's house it actually was came downstairs very upset.
So you really have to stop introducing me to girls and afterwards saying "he has his dick pierced" let them find out for themselves
You threw a bunch of trashcans into the middle of the street and nothing happened. I fell on one car and suddenly there were cops everywhere...
No. Mother. Fucking. Jello shots. Just no. I'm not falling into that trap again.
Mom just referred to a 9 year old as "this bitch", so I'd say day drinking was a success.
Koalas always seemed like really high little puppy kittens to me.
Handcuffs are allowed in carry on luggage :) just checked
I think the exact words were 'I'd lett him to the weirdest shit to me'
Pretty sure that propositioning you to fly across the country for sex fest '13 isn't something my husband would approve of.
My uterus feels like it went 8 rounds with Mike Tyson. And that was only a quickie.
long story short, he tried to fuck me standing up, toppled over, and now I have four stitches next to my eye
I'm going to blow a ton of money on sex toys just so I can tell you to do better than them.
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