I'm still reeling over the fact that you beat us all at Risk while you were flat on your ass drunk and falling asleep on South America.
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
we where pretty evenly matched until he threw me through that wall
Well, I looked over and you and him were each making out with a fireman. And then you switched. And you probably spent an hour like that.
Well last time he got out of rehab he lasted 6 hours. So 3 days this time is quite an accomplishment.
Is it possible to just pretend that everything we did after grilling up your goldfish didn't happen?
Fake an illness. Her and her friends are like the female version of guys who wear tapout shirts
Random question, but did I leave a spoon on your dresser last night?
I'm not so good at organized events that don't revolve around whiskey or playgrounds.
Yes. We drank 3/4 of a handle of vodka, fried and ate a 3lb package of bacon, I tackled the neighbors snowman, made snow angels in our underwear, and then fucked all night. Christmas success.
Can't tell if its the LSD or if that demon man just stared at my penis. Cleveland is a weird place. All true stories.
You went in the back with her.. And honestly I couldn't tell her neck from her tits man..
After we hooked up, his roommate shouted "I LIKE TO HAVE SEX TOO" from across the apartment
In two separate occurrences, I could have avoided getting my heart broken, and chlamydia, all with a left swipe.
I woke up with her finger in my vag. Let's just say that I'm one horny inquisitive drunk.
Randomize
