This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
Just saw your girl from last night... Be embarrassed
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
He did a 4 wheel burnout and yelled at the cops "Sorry! It's for a school project!". HOW does he think of this shit?
Trust me man, I did not put any cookies down your pants when you slept.
Seriously, I look like I crawled out of a bog. Succeeding at being as undateable as possible.
Please tell me I didn't try to make out with a 70 year old Romanian man last night ...
you walked around drinking beer out of a plunger and telling people it was a goblet...
WHAT IS HAPPENING
A FLOCK OF DICKS IS MIGRATING TOWARDS US.
I COULD CUT A FUCKING DIAMOND WITH MY RIGHT NIPPLE RIGHT NOW HOLY FUCK
If there's a nuclear war you can come over. I'll feed you soup and you can rig up car batteries to power the coffee pot and toaster. We can grow tomatoes and chickens.
good news, i've got tacos. bad news, kevin's in the ER. more good news, the tacos were free.
You know you're more responsible when you turn down your bed and make a clear path to it before you go out..
What do you think would be the best way to remove a baby carrot from a vagina?
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
Randomize
