Last night was proof dads should hug their daughters more
i saw a stretcher and literally ran around for 10 minutes telling people it wasnt for me
apparently "my dealer got arrested" is not an acceptable answer when mom asks "What happened? You look sad today"
he called you a drunk bob the builder and you proceeded to explain how you were going to build ramps throughout the house
NO YOU'RE NOT. I don't want to hear that SHIT. Jameson appreciation day part 1 is saturday and YOU WILL BE READY.
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
I'll be there in a few.
I'M COUNTING TO FEW.
And thanks to you I'm pretty sure I'm banned from every qdoba in south carolina. And cab company
What the hell man, you basically stole my girlfriend with a bucket of KFC.
As much as I enjoyed playing drunk half naked twister and talking about my daddy issues last time, I'll have to pass.
Shirley Temple died. We owe it to her to get dirty shirley wasted.
No way in hell. Unless I was drunk Tindering again....my swiping finger gets drunk too I guess
I just wish the first erections of my life didn't take place at a dentists office but hey whatever I turned out alright
Okay so my roommate deals some drugs so whenever he leaves we can hook up, be ready
I didn't know I was the on call booty call damn
Can we skype so I'm not drinking alone?
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