I'm afraid we're only dating because we're too lazy to look for anyone else.
8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
yea i thought the egg drop soup tasted weirdly like cum, and then i suddenly remembered what happened last night.
i'm never eating chinese again.
I dont care about anyone or anything else I just want to make love to you on my air mattress
I have my ice chest next to my bed. Instead of breakfast in bed, its beers in bed. 10x better
his apartment was in a funeral home, walk of shamed through a visiation in the skankiest outfit i own
I'm high and reading a Wikipedia article on circumcision procedure. Help.
If a handjob meant commitment I would literally touch zero dicks
It's simple. He fucks me at his place and I fuck him at my place. It's like man of the house gets to top.
Wow. Memory lane. What a horrendously unsightly jizz stain on the tapestry of life.
If it makes you feel any better they literally are drinking alcohol out of a toilet. They are serving drinks out of a nasty ass toilet...!
He tried to get me to go back to his place on the condition that he has 6 cats. I was very tempted but I said no. Hoping to go see the cats tomorrow
Babe if there was a way to give a back rub and head at the same time that's what I would ask for my birthday, Christmas and of course right now. Please think about how and get back to me.
You should probably come home from vacation now. I make badddd decisions when you're gone.
Randomize
