Apparently I did my philosophy paper last night. It's not bad either.
She gave me a bj in her parent's kitchen while I ate the rest of her mom's birthday cake. Fuck. Yes.
Im about to have a threesome, Ill pay you twenty bucks to go clean my room. Just throw it all in the closet.
I wore my front clasp bra so he would have to prove his sobriety to me before we had sex.
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besides i was ending his dry spell. it's written in the bible that jesus likes that right?
I take it that, because we are not guzzling a box of franzia, everything went alright?
N.C. cops just used a megaphone to tell me I have a slutty outfit. My life is complete.
Nothing says happy gameday like waking up in only an ACC Championship shirt in the qb's bed with a different football player
Sweating vodka and spray tan, I feel like a trophy wife.
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you got to sleep with him and don't even remember it? that's like sleeping through an entire vacation
Wanna know what sucks. Banging the bosses daughter at work and having the boss walk in while you are fucking on his desk. Good day though. Made 6 sales
we need to tell them stories about when happens when we're sober so they think they know what they're in for when they're actually completely unprepared for whn happens when we get drunk
Also, you fell asleep with you hand on and around my cock last night.
The condoms have been found. I repeat: THE CONDOMS HAVE BEEN FOUND. he isn't a collector!!!
I'm glad that we laid to rest the suspicion that he was keeping them in a scrapbook. yayy
You threw a beachball full of vodka at me and yelled I CHOOSE YOU then ran
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