my last 3 google searches were anal itchy vagina and ice cubes
love makes seman taste better
They asked me to help them shop for lingerie.
Tell them everything looks awful, makes their ass look fat, etc. You'll wreck their self esteem and likely both have sex with you to make themselves feel better.
You're the most understanding sister I could ever ask for.
How is it possible that i have sex with a guy and he makes YOU breakfast
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He is to the point where he forgot I was in the front seat of his car while he was taking me home...that stoned
Friends dont let friends get hit with a flaming baton without warning
It's been decided..lingerie is an investment. You get free breakfast and cab rides out of it.
I was ashamed to still be in my green tank this morning, but there's a guy here in full on bright green pants and a green blazer. He looks like the lucky charms guy stretched out at drunker than usual. Now, I fade into the background.
Fake an illness. Her and her friends are like the female version of guys who wear tapout shirts
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing says male bonding like watching porn with your grandpa
Why make bad decisions when I can watch you?
I'm not kidding, he literally jumped in the red panda exhibit. I knew this was gonna be a good birthday.
Fuck it, I work hard. I deserve nice sex toys
We decorated the tree, drank wine, and he went down on me with Christmas music on in the background. Christmas IS coming.
I feel like 20 angels jizzed in my mouth. This cupcake is DELICIOUS!
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